I haven't heard anything from the doctor today, I assume my last embryo didn't make it. I feel so torn with a lot of different emotions. I feel like a shell I'm here on the outside but I'm empty on the inside. I have this huge hole of the lose I feel for not being able to make a baby, which is something we are just suppose to be able to do as women. When did nature become so hard?
Today, I was thinking about when I had cancer and how much that was to go through. TJ thinks that I was so strong to go through all that but I didn't feel strong. I felt like I was going through the motions but there was a certain amount of numbness. I was thinking about how the bible says, God doesn't give you more than you can handle. Maybe this is how God helps us through the trying time. Even if we don't feel strong enough or just feel empty inside, we find a way to put one foot in front of the other and eventually the trail passes.
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